Conversations

Conversations

Today, a few thoughts about the work and conversations.

Opposite thinking is a characteristic of the formatory center, or Jack of Diamonds. I make a statement and my friend will negate it. He says something, and I think of an exception, a reason that it is not true. How many conversations go this way! To be able to find an exception to anything that anyone says is considered a sign of intelligence. If we are listening to someone, just observe how automatically these ‘I’s arise. “That’s not the whole story” “But…” “You are an idiot, you don’t see that…” We are ‘thinking’ of a reply before they finish what they are saying, or it even starts after the first two or three words that someone says. Opposite ‘I’s are often disguised as ‘adding something’ to what someone said.

A method to use the intellectual part of the intellectual center is to find what is true for us in what someone says and to comment on this. In that way, our conversations can be constructive instead of leading nowhere.

Another common occurrence is that once anyone gets the attention of a group, they can hardly be stopped, or even interrupted. Behind this is the tendency of the instinctive center to be an active force and take space just to take space. To some degree, this tendency is also behind opposite ‘I’s.

Another facet of ‘conversations’ is people constantly interrupting each other. It is again partly the above-mentioned tendencies of the instinctive center and partly a facet of simply being asleep. My teacher once advised himself, “If you want to say something, you must first be able to listen.” That is, to listen with attention and presence.

It's easier to see all these things in others than in ourselves. To be able to remember ourselves presupposes a certain control of centers, and these are three areas where we can begin to exercise this control.

David Tuttle

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Image: 'Interesting Conversation', by Federigo Zandomeneghi